Oh boy

And as he sat there next to me, all I could think was, "this will end up costing me a lot." Love is a funny thing because in some moments it is light enough to carry you up into the clouds. In this moment it just felt heavy.  The fear  can weigh you down like stones in your pocket. My heart broke a tiny bit when I realized I couldn't just give him a kiss. I wanted so badly to reach out to him, but every logical bit of me screeched, "No! you idiot." 

White sweater

Wore your white sweater to a party tonight at Joe and Carol's . I really like it. I wonder how your night at work went for you...I bet you were pretty beat after and ready for a good night's sleep. I am so looking forward to laying my head on my pillow. Ah tomorrow, monday, beginning of a new week.... I am very proud of you . I hope your Monday is wonderful, the mom

Frozen grapes

Dearest Iz-bug, I took the bus to north beach afterwork and met Soosee and Bernadette for a walk and birthday dinner. I am really stretching this birthday out.It was fun evening. your dad is out in Berkeley somewhere watching a singer sing some of Joshua's songs. Leo is cleaning is left paw butterball is hunched like a bunny on the rug beside the bed. Life is exciting around here so I thought you need to be kept abreast of the flurry of action.I still love you. have a wonderful Thursday.the mom

Myself myself

Today was long but.....

Happy mother

Dear Isabelle ,I love the images you create with your words. And it makes me happy to hear my love and your dad's love is a guiding light in the big sea. it was a good day at work.Mark took me out for a birthday lunch and when I was walking back across the presidio I just felt really lucky to be working in such a beautiful place with good friends amd meaningful work. now I feel very sleepy and would like to go straight to bed...maybe a nap first before dinner. the kitties are laying across me. that's all the exciting news for now....I love you

Out to sea

My youth, I'm discovering, is a strange and miraculous moment. I feel like a little sail boat in the middle of an overwhelming sea. Although the ever expanding ocean is breathtaking, it also feels all too consuming and scary. I am wondering through something that appears endless.
Mother you are like my light house. I guess just love is in general. It is magical guiding force that can been seen and felt from miles and miles away. If I know anything about kindness, gratitude, and love it is because of you. I carry a bit and you and dad everywhere I go. It is the unbelievable amount of love I've been given that keeps me a float everyday. I think that our experiences directly effect how we perceive the world. It is because of you that I am able to see so much beauty. I miss you everyday. You are my most trusted companion, and my kindred spirit. Can't wait to see you again.

love,

your little boat